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PARENTING
Tips &
Articles
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Building
children's character
CHARACTER
is a belief in an absolute system of right and wrong, combined with
the will to do what is right regardless of the cost. Therefore,
a person with character will say, "What's the right thing to do?" and a person with NO character will
say, "What's in it for me?". You automatically have
respect for a person with 'character'.
Character deals with the matters of the
heart--the inner you, not the outer you. The foundation of a
person is the character. When you are an adult, you should
proudly be able to say…I'm a person of character, I don't do what's
wrong".
In the
past, society defined success in terms of character--what a person
stood for, what a person believes, and the condition of the heart of
the person. Unfortunately, in today's society, the shift is from
character
to achievement, to performance, to doing.
It's no longer what the condition of your heart is, it's how well you
perform. We are living in a culture today when we come to a fork
in the road where we have to choose character over achievement, most
choose achievement. When that happens, there is an automatic
change in a person's ethics or values.
We are slowly eliminating from our thinking and
our line of sight the very thing we need most as individuals and as a
nation.
Why is it
important for parents to build 'character' in their children?
Your children
need to know within their hearts what is 'right' and what is 'wrong'.
Children who
have been taught 'character' by mom and dad automatically know 'right'
from 'wrong' and have the will to practice what is the right thing to
do regardless of the cost to them.
The key
is to instill in your children the very necessary "moral and
value" system that will build character and discipline.
This will enable your children to make the 'right choices' in their
lives and have the will to practice them when pressured by outside
influences, namely peer pressure.
Here are
some A-Z guidelines
A is for
Accountability
- Hold your children accountable for their behaviour.
Making
your children accountable for their behaviour teaches your kids right
from wrong.
It also teaches your kids that we are all
allowed to make choices and that you expect them to make the right
choice because they are a person of 'character'. All children
who have character make the right choice…guide your children to make
the right choice. He will quickly learn to be accountable for their
behaviour and make the right choice.
C is for
Character -
Help your son or daughter become a person with character, to be able
to know right from wrong and have the will to practice it.
"Our
society desperately needs men and women of 'character'. "
This profound statement was made by me as a
wake-up call to all parents worldwide as a result of the violence and
killings at Littleton High School in Colorado.
Children with 'character' know automatically in
their hearts that being violent is not the right thing to do
Our society is
the most informed and well educated society by far, yet unfortunately,
drug use of our young people is on the rise. More parents are
becoming alarmed and concerned then ever before and asking themselves
the question…"Gosh, I hope my child doesn't do drugs and become
a burden on me and society". A child of character knows
within their heart that it is "cool" to say NO to drugs.
He or she
will NOT be influenced to take drugs because mom and dad have taught
him/her 'character', it's as simple as that!
F is for
Forgiveness
- Practice forgiveness regularly and teach the importance
of it.
Teaching
your children to forgive others is the best way to achieve peace of
mind and live a stress-free life.
A great example of this is as follows.
Your daughter has had a disagreement with her friend and swears she
will never talk to her again. Ask her to forgive the friend and forget
the episode.
H is for Humour
- Make sure you keep your sense of humour. Laugh with your
children often.
Laughing
with your children as often as you can is not only enjoyable for you
and your children but more important it is very healthy as well.
Laughter gets rid of impurities and is good for everyone's
well-being. Children come out with funny things and are a joy to
behold.
N is for No
- Use it and mean it.
We all
know it's difficult to say NO to our children at times, but saying no
when you think the occasion requires it, is a must for all
parents. Do not let your children intimidate you. Just in
case you didn't know it, your children are smart you know and know all
the tricks to get mom and dad to change their minds
R is for
Respect -
Show your children due respect.
When
talking to your children, talk to them nicely to show them that you
feel they are worthwhile people. Do NOT shout, scream or yell at
your children. Parents must set the example, so their children
will learn from their example. Don't ever forget, parents,
children watch you, they want to be like you. Remember
also…children are just little people, extensions of what we
ourselves once were, they don't know any better…it's up to mom and
dad to teach them and guide them so they will know better from your
example, it's as simple as that.
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