[ HOME ] [ BACK ] [ BACK ]
Do you talk to your child about sex and sexuality?
How and how much should a growing child be told about taboo subjects.
Your son, who turns twelve
tomorrow, wants to know why Rishika sometimes get a blood stain on her
white uniform. Your neighbourís daughter would like to know why her
brotherís voice has begun to sound so hoarse? And why canít she
also pee while standing?
Be clear and candid
As a parent, you should be
clear in your mind as to how and what should a child know about sex
and sexuality. While you cannot let out every little detail about
taboo subjects, you should be able to tackle the questions
intelligently. Parents have to also consider the fact that children
get information from magazines, television and the Internet.
Therefore, there is no point in avoiding any queries. Parents shy away
from the questions of adolescent children, quite forgetting the fact
that their children might resort to some trashy magazines or a
misinformed peer group.
No pride, no shame
Sexuality is a very important
facet of life. Your children should have a healthy attitude towards
sex and allied issues. While they should not indulge themselves in
their anatomical assets, they should not even feel ashamed about any
bodies. They must have a positive perspective about the members of the
opposite sex. For instance, your teenage son should not take undue
pride in his muscular superiority over the neighborhood girls.
Similarly, your daughter should not hesitate to participate in the
basketball competition merely because of her sex.
Set an example
Your behaviour, as parents,
should set some inherent standards for the family. For example, an
unsure and unstable mother cannot give a reasonable explanation to her
daughter about the need for wearing a brassiere at the right age.
Similarly, a father who looks upon women as sex objects cannot stop
his son from eve teasing. Therefore, parents have to create a
reasonable value system for their children. They have to draw the
dividing line between promiscuity and openness.
Whether it is a sonís query
over pubic hair or a daughterís complaint against pre-menstrual
cramps, parents must give a patient hearing. It is always advisable
for both the parents to think together. Such teamwork also gives the
right signals to the children. The couple can segregate their
responsibilities. For instance, a mother will be able to better relate
to her daughterís psyche than to her adolescent son. Similarly, a
son will be able to discuss certain problems only with the father.
However, situations will have to be judged separately, without
deriving universally applicable solutions.
Other sources of information
Library books, educational television, academic workshops, selected sites on the Internet are among the credible sources of information for growing children. Sex education is an essential ingredient of any school curriculum. Parents should explain certain aspects to children by taking the help of their Biology and Science textbooks. For instance, if a boy is curious to know about pregnancy, parents must provide information not only from personal experience but also school textbooks.
[ HOME ] [ BACK ] [ BACK ]